I'm drivin' my snowmobile to the bar.......

Clarification.....Disclaimer.....whatever it needs to be called. This posting will not use real names of people and places....because those of you reading this will know exactly what I am referring to and nothing else needs to be said about THAT. Whew.
Let me set the scenario for you: Saturday night.... really cold and snowy. It just so happens to be the day of birth of a very volcanic and wonderful friend, we'll call her Amy (because that's her name) Special shout out to ya, girl!  She invites her dearest and nearest to go whoop it up at a local joint, which is on a lake, which has been around forever, which is near their house. I have heard odd stories about this place...let's just say the tales are of white trashers (ok-I said it), loose women, bleached hair, camel toe, fake suede boots, and a band whose members think they are true rockers-thru and thru. Oh-and our waitress was pregnant.
    Let's tackle the band first. If you ever wanted to hear Neil Young do a cover of Run DMC's "Tricky"...then you would have enjoyed the show. The most exciting part was the huge cowbell that was "passed" around the bar so that the patrons could live out their dreams of being a rocker and be a part of the show. I felt like I was at King's Island and at one of the featured musical revues. By the way-I walked into the bathroom for one of my many potties of the night and there was a bottle of Labatts in one of the toilets-that's classy and sexy.
    Now it's time to take on the patrons. Half of the people there had snowmobile stuff on and just got done doing donuts on the lake.Many people had Lions sweatshirts on that they bought when Barry Sanders played. Ooooo-where do I start with the ladies? So many species were represented. You have your typical 20 somethings with anything black and tight on-they go to this establishment to show the older ladies that they have no chance in hell of getting hit on because they have made a special effort to slut it up just enough to say...."I know I'm a slut....but don't tell anyone." They all wear boots (some wear pumps with jeans-which makes my skin crawl) and huge fake Chanel earrings. The 50 + crowd was great-they just want to drink and act like they know how to dance. You could tell that there were some die hard followers of the band....because they would practically soil themselves when the lead singer would point at them while singing "Hot Blooded". There were a few 50+ bleached blondes with frosted plum lipstick that I want to take to a drag bar-enough said.
All in all-nothing beats a great night with the greatest friends on earth...and despite all the mockery that I have hashed out...I would go back there in a minute.